RE: Birthers
Pish-posh!
If a non-natural born citizen were elected president, the original constitution would catch fire and burn a red, commie flame, shooting high above the Capitol, for 50 nights.
The Pope would have to be summoned to reset the unitedness of these United States, and then a quest would have to be made to find the ONE TRUE AMERICAN PRESIDENT, someone whose ESSENCE was TRULY AMERICAN, and that quest would have the House Ways and Means Committee scouring every mountain village of THIS EARTH to find the child whose eyes shine with that particular glow, who, with his or her tiny fingers, demonstrates Presidential dexterity and mein.
Beginning at that moment, the Living Document would begin to heal from the ravages of the 50 days of flame, and we would know for certain we had found the One True President. Then the child would have to sleep on soil extracted from the west side of the North Bridge at Concord for 13 days.
After that, our nation would be returned to its rightful glory. Every schoolchild knows this. It exhausts me to have to recall these early grammars for you here.
If any of this were true [Birthers], the whole world would know. The whole world would hold its breath ...
If a non-natural born citizen were elected president, the original constitution would catch fire and burn a red, commie flame, shooting high above the Capitol, for 50 nights.
The Pope would have to be summoned to reset the unitedness of these United States, and then a quest would have to be made to find the ONE TRUE AMERICAN PRESIDENT, someone whose ESSENCE was TRULY AMERICAN, and that quest would have the House Ways and Means Committee scouring every mountain village of THIS EARTH to find the child whose eyes shine with that particular glow, who, with his or her tiny fingers, demonstrates Presidential dexterity and mein.
Beginning at that moment, the Living Document would begin to heal from the ravages of the 50 days of flame, and we would know for certain we had found the One True President. Then the child would have to sleep on soil extracted from the west side of the North Bridge at Concord for 13 days.
After that, our nation would be returned to its rightful glory. Every schoolchild knows this. It exhausts me to have to recall these early grammars for you here.
If any of this were true [Birthers], the whole world would know. The whole world would hold its breath ...
posted by Constance X at 1:53 PM
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